It's been almost two months since I have written a blog. There have been so much going on lately and I really don't know where to start. Good things actually.
As an RA, God has been doing some awesome stuff in my life. I remember starting out being nervous about this position. It was like I just knew I was going to make a mistake. Ha. However, I am actually adjusting really well. Still learning about things here and there, but for the most part, I really love being one. I am greatly humbled that I have this position because I do not deserve it. The fact that I am being used as a vessel by God has truly blessed me. It's been amazing for one how I've been able to develop a relationship with the girls on my hall. Trying to spend some time with them individually. While I've always been the type of person to know a lot of people, I can't really say that I've had as much of a valuable relationship with people like I do with most of the girls on my hall. While there are some that I'm still working on in a way, I'm still pretty excited that I'm getting through to them.. even the ones that I least expected.
Being an RA is like being a mom. Honestly, I do feel like a mom. If the girls accomplish anything, I have this pride in them like any parent would. I want to spank them, but I want to be there for them when they're going through anything. (I'm somehow still trying to figure out how to emphasize with them better. But I'm sure it'll come). On the spiritual standpoint, I truly understand why my relationship with God is so important in this position. It is emotionally and spiritually draining. I've caught myself more emotional about things that I'm rarely emotional about. Spiritually, I've noticed how much more I need to spend time with God, through His word and definitely through prayer. I've learned why it is so important for us to pray for others. The girls of my hall needs prayer. There are so many emotional things that each girl is going through in some way. Sometimes I wish that I could help them, but I know that the best thing that I can do for them is to be there.. and to pray for them. I have been able to see the changes take place already and I'm looking forward to seeing how great things will become at the end of the school year.
Roommate wise. Honestly.. I have to say that my roommate Morgan is by far the best roommate that I've had. I did have a great roommate freshman year and she is still a pretty great friend of mine now. But having Morgan as a roommate has been great on so many levels. For one, I do feel as though we can talk about spiritual things more so on a conversational level than a preaching level. For the past two years, I've felt as though I was preaching whenever I mentioned something spiritual. We seem to have a pretty good dynamic partnership wise. I'm glad that I'm able to learn from her as an RA and as a person. We haven't had any conflict. I haven't been angry at her or had any complaints. Its been awesome so far.
But this past month, I have begun to learn so much more about God. So much more about my relationship with Him. I've learned how to pursue Him better. I've probably mentioned it before, but I've come to learn that I needed to be more transparent with God. Yes, I know that He knows everything already, but when I'm able to confide in Him emotionally, it develops the trust that I need to have for Him. It's been shockingly easy for me to start. Especially because of the minor details that I somehow can't really talk to anyone else about. Yet, God still is there to understand how I feel and still looks at me the same. I think that, along with building my empathy levels is my top thing to work on this school year. I think that my transparency with God and my willingness to change things, will get rid of all the boundaries that could arrive. I'm excited about learning more about Him through my own personal transparencies.
Well, that's a mini, choppy update of my life. I'm going to try writing more later.
-Quayla
